Content may contain affiliate links including Amazon Associate links. If you click & make a purchase, I receive a small commission that helps keep this site up and running, at no cost to you. Read my full disclosure policy.

Allison’s Birth Story – The Back Story

Telling a story means reliving it. The emotions and the physical feelings, the good and the bad. It all comes rushing back. For months, I have been reluctant to relive Allison’s birth. It was too hard. I started talking about Allie’s birth to my friend Julia not long ago. Talking to Julia about it led to talking about it on Twitter and thinking about it more often. I am finally ready to accept the experience, to lay out the details, to share it publicly. It happened. I can’t change it. It happened, and it’s okay. It’s about time. The Back … Read more

10 Weeks Old

Allie is 10 weeks old now. Her hair is still red and her eyes are still blue. I still feel like I’m hanging on by a thread here. Not in the I’m about to go crazy sense. More like the How am I supposed to accomplish anything? sense. I honestly don’t know how anyone manages more than two babies. But she sure is cute. And she’s starting to smile a lot. And sit up. Oh my. All that action tuckers her out pretty quickly. Our days are just packed.   Happily submitted to Wordful Wednesday,  Go Graham Go, Newlyweds!, Better … Read more

The Difference a Month Makes

January 15 Allison was 3.5 weeks old, and still 6 ounces below her birth weight. February 15 Today, Allison is 7 weeks old. She is growing quickly, but I’m not sure exactly what she weighs. I’m guessing she’s at least 3 pounds above her birth weight, but she may be more than that. She’s definitely substantial. And so very cute. Especially on days like today, when she actually took substantial naps throughout the day. Happily submitted to Wordful Wednesday,  Go Graham Go, Newlyweds!, Better in Bulk, Resourceful Mommy, and Angry Julie Monday

When Breast Isn’t Best

I wanted – desperately – to breastfeed both of my children. Grace never latched on to my breast. Though I tried just after she was born, she refused. She would occassionally open her mouth for my breast, but wouldn’t suck. I’ve talked about Grace’s refusal to latch before. She never successfully breastfed. I didn’t know what else to do, so when the pediatrician and lactation consultant told me to give her formula, I did. Though I deeply regretted my failure to breastfeed Grace, I came to appreciate the formula. Formula made my baby gain weight. She quickly became healthy and … Read more

I Want to Remember

I haven’t written much in the last two weeks. When Grace was born, I wrote every day. I wanted to remember every moment, every little sigh and every baby grunt. I haven’t written anything this time because I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to remember the sadness, the tears, the hardships. I don’t want to remember how crying became normal, nor how I detached from my children. I don’t want to remember the struggles, the frustration, the mourning for my former family, for easier times, for deep sleep. I don’t want to remember the temper tantrums, the anger, … Read more